in North America it is, you knew exactly what I meant
Around The League - 2024-25 Regular Season
- Thread starter GGpX
- Start date
Habsy
Not playing around anymore.
WeHaveMoreCupsThanYou
I will get banned again soon, worry not.
True but Miller's mom is a classic Karen. They ask her about her kid's behavior and her answer is "Do you even know how good my son is at hockey?" as if this is the only thing that matters.
RedLight
Well-known member
My guess based on that statement is his mother has no ability for empathy and only displays affection when he is accomplishing things that reflect good on her. It's not "how good Mitchel is at hockey", it's "my son".
At some time he became wired that through his actions, he can gain some lacking affection and approval. It's probably what drove his success in hockey. So what action can provide a low risk high reward for someone in school, lacking empathy skills and seeking affection? Tearing down someone lower on the social spectrum certainly works well, coming with a temporary mass acceptance from his peers. Of course being only temporary, the behavior has to be repeated to continue it's benefits. Really if you look at it, the bullying became an addiction.
If there is blame it should be on the parents for failing to recognize their own illness before passing it on. Of course with it being a different time, the research or availability of help were not in place as they are today, making that diagnostic nearly impossible.
Luckily we live in a period where the research is now readily available. With time and therapy his brain and behaviours can be reprogrammed. Empathy is something that can be developed. My hope is this healing will come with enough time to break the generational trauma before he has children and passes on the burden to them.
This is why I have an issue with simply labelling him a "racist asshole", it goes much deeper then that.
At some time he became wired that through his actions, he can gain some lacking affection and approval. It's probably what drove his success in hockey. So what action can provide a low risk high reward for someone in school, lacking empathy skills and seeking affection? Tearing down someone lower on the social spectrum certainly works well, coming with a temporary mass acceptance from his peers. Of course being only temporary, the behavior has to be repeated to continue it's benefits. Really if you look at it, the bullying became an addiction.
If there is blame it should be on the parents for failing to recognize their own illness before passing it on. Of course with it being a different time, the research or availability of help were not in place as they are today, making that diagnostic nearly impossible.
Luckily we live in a period where the research is now readily available. With time and therapy his brain and behaviours can be reprogrammed. Empathy is something that can be developed. My hope is this healing will come with enough time to break the generational trauma before he has children and passes on the burden to them.
This is why I have an issue with simply labelling him a "racist asshole", it goes much deeper then that.
RedLight
Well-known member
Cause is always relevant. The very foundation of science is based on discovering cause. Whether the effect is desirable or not is what's not relevant.
Habsy
Not playing around anymore.
In this case.
It is not.
The situation is what it is, there's no room for cause on the unrepentant. While I agree the parents obviously had a lot to do with it you can either be like them or choose not to be like them. Yes there is a choice. I know people that had terrible upbringings and they're top notch.
Cause is irrelevant in this case. This isn't science.
RedLight
Well-known member
Whether these people turned out top notch according to your emotion based standards means nothing. Most people are experts in hiding their trauma, it doesn't cripple their ability to live day to day life enough to notice, or they've had the privilege of diagnostics and therapy. If there was a terrible upbringing, there will be maldevelopment somewhere. Science doesn't lie. Even if hidden the anxiety often manifests later in life via other diseases.
It's why many cancer victims are considered the nicest, I suppose top notch, people. It's not because cancer seeks out these people, but they have trauma that impairs their ability to express emotions. This ends up compromising the immune system making it easier for other disease to take hold.
And you're way off if you think it's a choice. It's not, it's a flight or fight auto response left over from our hunter gatherer days. It was instrumental in getting us here, but is now vastly outdated for our current society. By putting your head in the sand and claiming my science based arguments aren't science, while responding with an argument clearly based on uninformed opinion, clearly shows a ignorance and close mindedness towards this subject.
Honestly, I expected better of you Habsy.
RedLight
Well-known member
Here's a 2015 article from the American Psychology Association that does a better job of explaining then I can:
and something a little more current:
psycnet.apa.org
and something a little more current:
APA PsycNet
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Habsy
Not playing around anymore.
I expected you to understand the difference between private enterprise and your dream of what should be.
RedLight
Well-known member
You've mistaken my intent then as I have no dreams for private enterprise. What the NHL does I could care less about, my focus has been on the individuals and trying to provide scope of how this can happen. It's about awareness towards mental illness. This is something that affects everyone whether you're in denial or not and I see no issue in pulling the curtain back. If this conversation gets the ball rolling for anyone not overly privileged to start looking into their own mental health and healing, it's a success.
If there is a dream here, it's that all people understand how the mind actually works. With understanding comes healing. With healing comes the ability to stop the cycle of passing down trauma.
You end all the trauma cycles, there's no more war, shootings, presidents with cults, bullying, incels or addiction. It seems an essential, yet obviously unattainable step in the evolution of our species.
But yeah, I agree that in his present state of mind Mitchel shouldn't be in the NHL if that's what you're pretending I'm arguing for.
Habsy
Not playing around anymore.
RedLight
Well-known member
You provide nothing that backs your argument up. I have in great length. People don't traumatize themselves, that's 100% foolish. It may be pedantic but it's is still digestible by anyone with basic reading comprehension. I'm not in this field, but I have done enough research and witnessed enough mental illness to know what's real. Let's not forget even you got fooled into thinking I was a professional.
It's unreal that you refuse to dig into this topic and instead try to discredit this information based on false beliefs. Having empathy for someone despite the effect of their trauma isn't wrong, it's important to understand to prevent this from continuing. We see the effects everywhere. The prison system is full of people with very little chance of healing. The streets are full of addicts who have very little chance of healing. People are getting killed by guns everyday.
Maybe have a look into why you have displaced angry here towards someone who has an argument that opposes your beliefs. There's something there no doubt. Maybe you can't appear wrong, I don't know. Like I said, we're all affected whether you're blind to it or not. Personal success doesn't mean you're trauma free.
Anyways I'm done this argument with you. You clearly lack knowledge on the subject, can't make a proper argument to back up your claims, and are beginning to manifesting anger into personal attacks. There's no point in continuing this with you as you clearly aren't healthy enough to look deeper into this subject.
