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I don't want religion in my schools, but I don't want any other interference either. The idea, as a parent, that your child's school would hide anything from you is crazy imo.

My opinion as a parent.
 
Bleedsblue&white said:
I don't want religion in my schools, but I don't want any other interference either. The idea, as a parent, that your child's school would hide anything from you is crazy imo.

My opinion as a parent.
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That isn't what it is though. It is about that requirement.
 
worm said:
That isn't what it is though. It is about that requirement.
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Yeah, but try to have some empathy instead of just assuming everything that doesn't fall into lockstep with your ideas is patently bad or wrong.

"you" in general.

Think about your own kids, think about their school...are you saying you trust that institution over your own parenting, because that's the kind of thoughts that can go through your head.

It's too bad it's being used as a weapon by either side, though of course one side is trying to let live, the other would prefer some people don't exist.
 
Bleedsblue&white said:
I don't want religion in my schools, but I don't want any other interference either. The idea, as a parent, that your child's school would hide anything from you is crazy imo.

My opinion as a parent.
Click to expand...

Serious question though...if your child is old enough for it to be a functioning issue...why is their gender identity your business if they don't make it your business?
 
Bleedsblue&white said:
I don't want religion in my schools, but I don't want any other interference either. The idea, as a parent, that your child's school would hide anything from you is crazy imo.

My opinion as a parent.
Click to expand...
the concern, which seems justified to me, is that by forcing schools to out kids to their parents, those kids will then face abuse from those very same parents.

picture this scenario - teenager is out as trans at school, not to parents. parents are religious extremists. school outs parents, who tell the kid, "stop pretending to be X or get out of my house".

I don't know what the right answer is, but the current policies we see in progressive jurisdictions are designed to prevent outcomes like the one I describe above.
 
MindzEye said:
Serious question though...if your child is old enough for it to be a functioning issue...why is their gender identity your business if they don't make it your business?
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Yeah, you don't get it, and that's cool.

I don't care about that, I care about school doing schooling only.
If I had my way there would be no catholic schools for example....I want complete separation.

Besides, bringing two kids through the system I have seen that the system sucks.
 
Bleedsblue&white said:
Yeah, but try to have some empathy instead of just assuming everything that doesn't fall into lockstep with your ideas is patently bad or wrong.

"you" in general.

Think about your own kids, think about their school...are you saying you trust that institution over your own parenting, because that's the kind of thoughts that can go through your head.

It's too bad it's being used as a weapon by either side, though of course one side is trying to let live, the other would prefer some people don't exist.
Click to expand...

So full disclosure, I'm not a parent. Not necessarily by choice if that matters but it is what it is. In my experience discussing this with parents, I've honestly found a pretty serious lack of accepting the independent personhood of their children. I've brought that up and heard it explained away a few different ways that all exist within the same theme: they can be their own person when they pay their own bills. Which is....kind of a fucked up view of kids imo.

So I said that to say this...parents don't own their children (within this context, I mean children old enough where gender identity is a functioning thing in their life....a 6 yr old boy who wants to play with barbies and wear makeup doesn't understand the concept of gender identity...assume I'm discussing high school aged children for the duration of this). So if a parent's child doesn't feel comfortable sharing their ideas about gender identity with their parent, there's a reason for that. Not all of them necessarily bad either. But there's a reason. The moment you force the only other adults in their support network to start spying on them, you've removed the last adult line of defence from being able to have these very mental health centric conversations with your kid....because your kid will simply not come out to anyone they know is required to notify parents.

Again, not a parent. But if a parent in 2024 isn't having a "birds and the bees" chat about sexual/gender identity and expressing unconditional love in a way that makes their kid feel comfortable sharing their identity with said parent, but instead wants to turn their teachers into an amatuer gestapo, making their kid feel more and more isolated....well have at it. I'm sure we can just keep blaming video games, or music or whatever for rising teen suicide rates forever.
 
Wayward DP said:
the concern, which seems justified to me, is that by forcing schools to out kids to their parents, those kids will then face abuse from those very same parents.

picture this scenario - teenager is out as trans at school, not to parents. parents are religious extremists. school outs parents, who tell the kid, "stop pretending to be X or get out of my house".

I don't know what the right answer is, but the current policies we see in progressive jurisdictions are designed to prevent outcomes like the one I describe above.
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That's possible, but the odds are the people who would give them grief are not family.

The idea that you need to protect your a child from it's family first, as if that's the norm, is weird.

I mean I feel the left does the same thing the right does, paint worst case scenarios and run with that.

I don't think the school needs to tell the parent, I also don't think there should be a law putting schools over parents...in general.

carry on
 
Bleedsblue&white said:
That's possible, but the odds are the people who would give them grief are not family.
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I think research shows this isn't the case though, and that's where this policy comes from. I'm willing to be corrected on this, but this is my impression.
Bleedsblue&white said:
The idea that you need to protect your a child from it's family first, as if that's the norm, is weird.

I mean I feel the left does the same thing the right does, paint worst case scenarios and run with that.
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except there are examples where this has happened with terrible results. I think you're overestimating the emotional intelligence of a lot of American parents, especially in southern states.

again, I'm not sure what the best solution is. but the concern is IMO valid and based on enough real examples.
 
Bleedsblue&white said:
Yeah, but try to have some empathy instead of just assuming everything that doesn't fall into lockstep with your ideas is patently bad or wrong.

"you" in general.

Think about your own kids, think about their school...are you saying you trust that institution over your own parenting, because that's the kind of thoughts that can go through your head.

It's too bad it's being used as a weapon by either side, though of course one side is trying to let live, the other would prefer some people don't exist.
Click to expand...
This is a thing in Berta as well so I'm assuming it is the same...
I could be wrong about this but my understanding is the teachers are required to tell the parents. That is actually the schools not just being about teaching. That is the school being more involved.

I do have kids but they aren't school age yet so I'll use my brother as an example. A kid stole his ring. The teacher called my mom to ask her if the ring was valuable and important. Then greatly implied she did not want to have to call the thiefs dad because that kid would then show up with fresh bruises.

Point being. Removing the grey area is a problem.

My thought on it...

If a teacher knows a kid is gay, trans, etc and the parents don't... There is a reason for that.
 
The kids will come out to a trusted teacher specifically because they feel safe doing so. All a rule forcing teachers to disclose does is removes the trusted teacher from the list of people the kid will come out to. Opens up a whole ass can of worms as well. What if the teacher just hears other kids talking about it. Do they inform the parent? Do they question (interrogate) the kid?

Sounds like a really good way to take an adolescent already struggling with who they are and make them feel super, super isolated.
 
Wayward DP said:
this is the salient point I think
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Almost all the positive stories of ppl coming out that I've heard are "ya, we know"

The negative stories that I've heard are usually the parents cutting off ties with the kid (young adult). Only a few stories of physical abuse I've heard directly. Not to even talk about the mental health impacts.
 
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